In My Visions: Two Years Later
IN MY VISIONS is two years old! Here's my place and personal space.
When I have words to say, but no one to say them to...except to myself, I share it here.
In this two-part blog post, I reflect on this website and on the self.
Two Years Old
Two years ago, I sought after my own space online to share the pictures, the visions, the memories, the thoughts and the journey of my growth with photography. Now, I can't believe In My Visions is two years old! I used to think that it would be hard to maintain a site because I didn't know how frequently I would be able to post. Then I realized that timing didn't matter because there is no deadline with something like this. It was all about when I felt like sharing my inspirations, thoughts and moods. No pressure, just pleasure.
With this new year, I already have a great feeling about my visions to come. I know I will continue to travel. Above all, I look back at everything I've done with this website and I see how much it has in turn helped me grow. For those of you who have followed me since I first began this website, thank you for your undying support. And, for the newcomers along the way...I always welcome your visits! Whether you check this website at random, or hardly at all, I hope that those glimpses still allow you to see this space as a reflection of me and find peace, feel comfort, and see beauty in color and nature.
In My Visions brings me joy, excitement and pride.
If you've ever read "The Alchemist," you'll understand that I've learned part of my personal legend. This website is a part of that legend. There is so much beauty in this world and I want to see it my own way. In My Visions will take me to those places. As will my curiosity, wonder and empathy.
Love,
Laura
PS: New year, new logo!
Fun fact: I scribbled that down on a post-it note nearly half a year ago and only recently found it in my notebook. Now I brought it to life, and i'm digging it...so far!
Until next time. Thanks for reading all the way through!
Connecting the Dots
Somewhere between the ages of 4-7, I was playing connect-the-dots without a ruler and with bright colored markers. I didn't connect them in numerical order, as I should have because what did I really know about numbers? It's not like I grew up a typical Asian and already learned that ahead of pre-K...oh wait. Well, what was meant to look like a cow jumping over the moon turned into ET on a psychedelic trip in another dimension. Lines were drawn off the pages, on to tables and even the walls. I connected them the way I felt like doing so, and didn't let numbers tell me what to do!
“You can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something - your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life.”
Somewhere between the ages of 4-7, I was playing connect-the-dots without a ruler and with bright colored markers. I didn't connect them in numerical order as I should have because what did I really know about numbers? It's not like I grew up a typical Asian and already learned that ahead of pre-K...oh wait. Well, what was meant to look like a cow jumping over the moon turned into ET on a psychedelic trip in another dimension. Lines were drawn off the pages, on to tables and even the walls. I connected them the way I felt like doing so, and didn't let numbers tell me what to do!
I also loved the idea of stars and space. When a pack of glow-in-the-dark stars were gifted to me, I scattered them across my room, on my ceiling, all corners of the walls and directly overhead so that every night I'd stare at them until I'd fall asleep. I was mentally connecting those stars, too.
Then, there were those "beauty" marks appearing all over my body and on my face that wouldn't wash away with soap. At one point, I imagined what design I could create if I connected them. No, I didn't draw on myself, but I almost did...with a pen. I was 20. Just kidding, these are all anecdotes of toddler Chang.
As I got older, the concept of connecting the dots became a lot more figurative than literal-- as all things in life do. The memories of my past have become nothing but a dream. But, I look back and I reflect often. Every stage in my life, every painful memory, every year that goes by, I wonder why something or someone resonates. And it is only by looking back at certain moments, whether joyous or tearful, that I've learned from my mistakes and realized how far I've come, and how to prepare for the future.
The catch is...what exactly am I preparing for when I don't even know what the future holds? How do you prepare for something that is unknown? There really is no preventative measure to take. As I stand on my current dot, I guess let's call it dot 25--a dot for each year-- I realize that I really can't connect to 26. I can imagine myself using that bright marker and drawing lines out of order, but it isn't really in my control. I do just have to believe that some way, somehow it'll all connect until eventually the future is right now all over again at dot 30 and dot 40, or dot 80 if I ever make it there.
I live a little terrified every day, but it's just a matter of how much terror I reveal. Some days are more exciting than others. Some days are a little more quiet than others. All I can do is live it one day at a time. But, at dot 25, I no longer have glow-in-the-dark stars stuck to my ceiling and walls. I just look up to the sky and search for the brightest in this light polluted city I live in.
<3,
Laura
